DC Sniper Shootings

Washington Killings Result of Domestic Violence

By Robyn Stubbs October 18th, 2007 - 09:32 am PT

In the historic case of DC vs. Heller, the Supreme Court recently decided Washington, DC's 32-year ban on hand guns was unconstitutional. The ban was implemented in 1976 in an effort to curb the city's astronomical murder rate. With incidents like the 2002 DC sniper case forever written into the city's violent history, the ban is stirring a national debate over gun control laws.

Mildred Muhammad, ex-wife of John Allen Muhammad (better known as the DC sniper) has some thoughts on the issue. Mildred is a public speaker on domestic abuse issues and helps other women suffering from domestic abuse through her website http://www.afterthetrauma.org. She was married to John Muhammad for more than 12 years and they have three children together.

I remember when I realized John was going to kill me.

We were separated, and he came over to the house and said he wanted to talk to me in the garage, because it was private. When we got into the garage, he said, “You are not going to raise my children by yourself. You have become my enemy, and as my enemy I will kill you.”

I was very scared because I saw the look in his eyes. I quickly left the garage and ran to my brother and told him that John said he was going to kill me. My brother said, “Well, he probably didn’t mean it; he was just trying to scare you.”

DC Sniper Driven by Domestic Abuse

The thing with John is that his violence was not physical. It was mental, emotional and financial. He was trying to control me.

He didn’t appear to be threatening to anyone because he was very cautious as to how he presented himself. But when you crossed him, you saw a different side of him. And he only let you see enough for you to know that he meant business.

What Prompted the DC Shootings

I was watching the news when the shootings were happening, but I didn’t know I was the target until ATF came and took me to the police station for questioning. They told me that they were going to name my ex-husband as the sniper.

As soon as they told me, I knew he was here to kill me because he had also kidnapped the children.

He had the children on weekend visitation in March 1999. He was supposed to bring them back and yet they got on the plane that night and went to Antigua. He had them for 18 months. He also emptied the bank account so I had to go to a shelter.

In that shelter, I did not go near a window. The ladies there were like, “Mildred, come on, let’s go outside?” I said, “No, you don’t understand. This man is going to kill me."

Lots of them said, “Girl, you’re crazy. That man is not going to kill you -- if I were you, I’d be out there looking for my children."

I just couldn’t get anybody to believe me.

Death Row Sentence for John Allen Muhammad

His best friend turned him in.

I called to thank him for saving my life. He said, “Mildred, you and I both know John came there to kill you. I called the FBI because I knew it was John doing the shootings and I did not want to see your name scrolling at the bottom of my TV screen saying that you were dead. When I called, they did not believe me. It would be several days before they called me back to ask for my description of John again.”

John had get the weapons for him. Is better gun control the way to go? That would be a step, but if someone is determined to kill you, they’re going to find a way. John had a restraining order against him -- the laws were in place. He found a way. Right now, John is in a Sussex prison, on death row, trying to overturn his sentence.

If you are in a domestic violence situation and need a safely plan, log onto my website www.afterthetrauma.org, go to the resource page and download a personal safety plan. Complete it, hide it and plan to leave. Please get help. You’re not alone.

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Comments

Posted 22/10/2007 at 9:18am Cynthia Langenberger

I love your story Mildred. I'm so sorry that people did not believe you and that you & the children went through such a horrible ordeal.

Posted 22/10/2007 at 12:47pm Michelle Kenneth

Thank you for sharing your story, Mildred. I had left DC just 3 months before the sniper killings began. I was so scared for all of my friends. It hits home really hard when you see these places you used to frequent and go to all the time become completely unsafe. Just thinking of walking out of the Home Depot to go to your car and being shot and killed out of nowhere is just so frightening...and that was the Home Depot I went to!!!! Every time the sniper hit, I was so afraid one of my loved ones' names was going to scroll across that screen. He invoked so much terror into the lives of people in that area, so how is this man a good man???

I am happy to see that you are healing from your trauma. One of the greatest steps you can take in the healing process is by helping others. After being a victim of sexual harassment and sexual assault, I started working with organizations that seek to help women who have been the victim of violence. It is all a part of the healing process to be able to help others, because we've been there before and understand.

Anyone who is well versed in domestic violence knows that it's not always physical. There are other aspects: financial, psychological and mental abuse. There were signs there all along. You saw them and you got out. If people had believed you when you said he was dangerous and he was going to kill you, maybe all of those people who died would still be living.

This should be a lesson for people...take everything seriously when someone with fear in their eyes asks you for help. It's real. You may be saving not only that person's life, but the lives of others. You have no idea what people are capable of. Who else can see the monster buried deep inside someone then the person who loves them, sleeps with them, and lives with them. They can see what you cannot see. So when they run to you for help...BELIEVE.

Posted 22/10/2007 at 1:44pm Margaret Holborow

I never knew my husband had a clone...

Posted 26/10/2007 at 6:15pm Luyen Dao

It's very disturbing to hear your account of a person who is so skilled at mentally domineering others, that's a skill that is both cowardly and wrong - i honestly feel sorry for this man, who can't distinguish what is right from wrong, and pretends to be a good person on the outside.

To a small extent, i think we all try to put up a good front even when we don't feel like it - but he's obviously taken some internal resentment to a new level - i'm glad you are on a path to recovery and happiness!

Posted 30/10/2007 at 8:55am Trisha Baptie

MIldred,
Your courage to discuss what your family went through and how your concerns and experiences fell on deaf ears is a very moving and honest look at what some women are subjected to behind closed doors and then how they are made more vulnerable by the system that is meant to protect them.

Because of the most unfortunate outcome of your story a bright light has been shone on you and I hope your voice resounds throughout the bureaucracy that tells women over and over again we are crazy for believing what we know to be truth about our abusive partners. Unfortunately it is a lot easier to believe a cut lip or bruised eye then it is to see a slowly and carefully torn town and destroyed human spirit.

Unfortunately there are women who use the system to try and control and manipulate men into doing what they want, I have seen it first hand.
By doing that they steal a lot of the power from the voice of a woman really in trouble, but even that I hope can be over come with adequate training in law enforcement so women who are truly terrified and in dire need are heard and responded to with swiftness and respect for their plight they find themselves in.

You are truly in my prayers as your family heals from this and I hope your family finds swift ,deep healing from this event.
I hope you live in great joy with much love and laughter with your beautiful children as you walk through your healing.

Posted 28/02/2009 at 11:46am Robyn Stubbs

Writer's note: This is not the original title. It was changed without my permission or knowledge, and I'm pretty sure Mildred, wasn't notified either. Robyn.

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