The first time I met Josef was when my friends Teresa and Esme and I had to collect chalet keys from his home. Looking back I suppose he was a bit odd, but I just put it down to the language barrier. I only know how to say a few things in Austrian, which I learnt during my first visit there.

He looked well-kempt. His hair wasn't all like a grey cloud like it is now. However, his trousers had no belt, but instead a length of cord. I can't help wondering about what he used the rope for now.

The chalets were adequate for our needs, however, they often smelled musty. The only personal touches that Josef has added were some old photographs from the war.

Once Josef made me walk to a convenience shop with him to buy matches for the pilot light on the chalet boiler. The shopkeeper did not have any matches, and Josef lost his temper and kicked over a display of some local produce. Then he grabbed a chocolate bar and did not pay for it. The shopkeeper looked scared of him.

Even when he kicked over the display, Josef never intimidated me. I thought it was just a machismo thing because he was in the company of an attractive young woman. I did not see any maliciousness. He seemed kind. Once a wasp was trapped in the cloakroom of our chalet, and I was ready to zap it with some Bug-B-Gone, but Josef cupped it in his hands and set it free out of the window telling it to "fly away!"

I had not known he was convicted of rape previously. I always felt safe in his presence, but Teresa said that he pressed his erect, clothed penis against her buttocks in the chalet. We did not believe her because she is a bit of an attention seeker and also overweight. We could not see why he would single her out for sexual attention. Usually the men give more attention to me and the other gal pals, so we thought she was trying to make us jealous. We should have listened to her though.

I do not know how he might have been able to lead a double life. I think his wife Rosemarie must have been quite stupid not to wonder why her husband was spending ever so much time in the cellar.

The photos I see now of Josef look like they are of another man. When I knew him, I thought him strange, but a good man. When I see Josef in the newspapers today, he does not look like a good man. Maybe it’s because he has been caught, or maybe because he regrets his choices. It makes me feel sad for the family he has abused, but I do feel sad for him also…for what he has lost as a human.

I imagine it is very confusing for the family. They must have so many questions, and I fear that they will not find the answers to the question of why he did it. Maybe Josef will be the only person to know that now, but I think maybe he doesn't know himself. I would almost like to talk to Josef one more time, but I think it would be too hard. I can't help but feel sick and scared when I think of all this now.

I am not sure how you cope with a situation like this. It's not the kind of thing a family is supposed to ever cope with. I think they will have to pull together and be close, but not like Josef was close to them.

My initial hope was for Josef to suffer as he made his family suffer. I know that's what my other gal pals feel, and I know it is what everyone in the world feels right now!

When I think on about it, though, I am not sure I do want terrible things to happen to him. I think in a very strange way he did it out of love and not evil.

Josef obviously has serious problems with his emotions, and I think he could not show his affection in the normal way. I would like to see him realise what he has done is wrong, and for him to use his experience to help others who have similar desires to control them. I do not want to see any more men raping their family in dungeons in the news!

I think that Austria will not be seen in a good light after this tragic event. I will not be going back and I know my gal pals will not be either. Maybe they should take this chance to make changes to their laws and make it harder for people to be imprisoned and raped without people noticing.

Personally I am less trusting of people. I am scared when I think that something like this could happen under my very nose and we do not notice.

As for where we will be vacationing from now on, we have booked an apartment in Crete for this summer. Esme knows the area and has taken Teresa before. I am looking forward to it as I have never been.