Sagittarius
Michael was born in 1963, ten months into a disastrous marriage. I was young and immature, not ready for the responsibility of a baby. Too much was already wrong in my life. My husband was an alcoholic who frequently gave me beatings, even violently kicking me in the stomach while I was pregnant; it didn't matter to him whether I was pregnant or not when he flew into one of his violent rages.
The whole time I was pregnant he continued to go out with "the boys." The result of his abuse and neglect of me was that I resented being pregnant and therefore resented my unborn baby. Michael's birth didn't improve circumstances, of course. My husband continued to go out, but by now I knew that it wasn't "the boys" he was seeing.
As Michael grew here in Texas, I noticed a strong resemblance to his father who was becoming increasingly violent. Because Michael looked so much like his father, I resented him more and more. Though the most violent beatings were reserved for me, Michael came in for his own share of abuse. I remember one incident that happened when Michael was still a baby. He toddled over to his sleeping father and tugged on his hair. His father jumped up and yanked the baby's hair so hard that Michael screamed. "There!" he roared at Michael. "That will teach you!"
The violence and abuse continued, and in May of 1966 Michael's brother Shawn was born. For some reason still unknown to me, I wanted Shawn. Michael sensed this and resented him.
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Comments
I hate to say it but, I
By Karen Smith, November 27, 2006 at 23:25I hate to say it but, I think that if it had been Shawn charged with murder the mother would have done everything she could to get him a decent lawyer.
It was sad... a very sad end
By Arpita Sutradhar, June 29, 2006 at 10:47It was sad... a very sad end to an otherwise mighthave been a good son and a good citizen. The fault lies not in the boy committing murder, but in his suppressed and confused state of mind. After reading the story I as a mother personally felt that the narrator could have atleast tried being a a good mother. Did her son decide on being born to her?No, he came in hard circumstances but nothing comes in the way of a mother's natural love for her child. If she could love her second son who was also sired by her drunkard husband what fault was it of the fisrtborn? Children often bear the brunt of their parents dislike like a stigma thruout life and this man had got nothing but anger, irritation and abuses from birth. I pity the mother for her short-sightedness in raising children.
I don't feel any special
By sad_bird418@yah..., June 23, 2006 at 15:23I don't feel any special sympathy for murderers or rapists, but although I am not a Christian as many dp proponents claim to be I believe that all human beings deserve forgiveness, even if they have committed terrible crimes, otherwise the Christian term forgiveness does not make any sense. And although it is not at all an excuse, a majority of the death row inhabitants had a terrible childhood - and as it seems that society did nothing to support them at that time, one could consider at least to treat them like human beings now.
Niels Graverholt
http://www.fdp.dk/
Re: My Son Was Executed
By kimfujioka, October 17, 2008 at 03:05The story of Michael's life is so sad. I don't condone his violent behavior as an adult; but I do blame his mother for not protecting him early in his life. I speak from experience. I had a very violent childhood and my mother did not protect me. However, as an adult I have a normal life and am very loving, with a child of my own. I am 50 years old today and I can say that I have spent most of my adult life in therapy, as a direct result of the abuse I endured as a child. A mother/or parent has to protect their child from abuse. There are no extenuating circumstances that can excuse a parent from this primary responsibility. That being said-- and getting back to writing itself-- I was struck by the little emotion expressed by the narrator (the mother ? ). As a reader, I had to ask myself: why is she telling this story of her son ? To receive some kind of notoriety or monetary reward ? Because a woman who would abuse her own child, over and over again, and speak of it so openly without remorse, might certainly use his story as a way for her own benefit. Why would she use this piece of writing in defense of her son when, during his actual life, she did little to benefit him ? It's a very sad story. And I feel no pity at all for the mother.