Finding The Words To Cover The Trial

As we were handed our court passes on that first day, I realized I was going to be sitting in the same courtroom as Robert Pickton for the first time. "I don't want to" was my first thought; "I need to" was my second. I needed to because I needed to see if staring at him long enough, or some slight body movement would give me a clue about his guilt or innocence. It did not.

Nothing could have prepared me for the first day of trial and listening to the Crown describe how heads of victims were cut in half, how bodies had been mutilated and other atrocities I will let other media report. It was a physical blow. Somehow the words spoken became a tangible thing that hit me and left me gasping for air - it left me reeling at the horror at what had been done to the women I used to work alongside on Vancouver's streets.

But then Day Two came, and I realized I needed to put on jury's glasses and just look at the evidence as instructed by the judge. I needed to focus on the evidence, as that is where my answers would be found. To watch the tape of his interrogation can be mind-numbingly dull, but I stayed firmly planted in my chair with my eyes glued to the video, for I knew that eventually, information would unfold and my questions might be answered.

Today was hard though. While the officer in the video performing the interrogation was trying to build rapport with Pickton, he referred to a poster of the missing women and infers that they were just throwaways; he said they were selling themselves and that they "deserved it" and these kind of things.