I Regret My Teenage Abortion

I am 25 years old. I am single. I am the only one in my circle of friends that doesn’t have any kids.

I work a boring office assistant job that has nothing to do with my bachelor’s degree and rarely keeps me challenged or motivated or with money in my pocket. I live with a roommate who used to be my best friend, but now thinks I am holding her back from whatever it is she wants to do.

The only thing I own of any importance to me is my queen-size bed, which my mom thoughtfully bought me for Christmas a couple of years ago. I smoke marijuana as often as possible, and I sell it sometimes to make money on the side.

I went to the nail shop yesterday by the university I graduated from. I saw some girls there that were obviously in grad school, based on the uninhibited conversation they were having. Listening to the way they talk and the way they sounded, I just looked at them and thought, I have the education too, but I’m not like you.

I was at my friend’s daughter’s 8th birthday party, and I looked around at all my friends with kids. Listening to their problems with money and baby daddies and watching them yell after their children running around the park just made me think, I could have had kids too but I didn't. I’m not like you.

I was at work and had to speak to a representative for another company. She was well-dressed, tall, plenty of makeup. Very well-spoken, but looked a little dumb when it came down to it.