The Morrissey Boys

I keep dating the Morrissey Boys - men in their late 30s and early 40s who are creative, well-educated, successful, melancholic brooders who spent too much time in the ‘80’s listening to The Smiths – my ex-fiancé included. They are plagued by indecision, because they have too many options to choose from.

The options, Ladies, are us. And who are we? We are the modern, innovative, compassionate, creative, well-educated, optimistic, self-sufficient women raised by the bra-burning feminists who learned from our mothers never to give in and live our dreams to the fullest. All of them! No mountain is too high that it cannot be climbed, no problem too difficult that it cannot be solved by our cunning ingenuity and compassionate natures.

It is true that I generalize, but having surveyed a large number of women - single, married, and in long time partnerships - it appears that my conclusions are correct.

Let us examine first the online dating scene - a practice I resisted for some time until recently one of my girlfriends convinced me that, “There are indeed men out there looking for real relationships, just like us!”

“Wow!” I thought. “What a cool concept!” So, I did it. I signed up, logged in and paid my fee. And there he was, Mr. Right, directly in front of me in black and parchment basking in the halo of the romantic valentine red that traces the perimeters of the Lavalife page.

I have since learned that I am a bit dated in this practice, as I have recently been informed by one of my very computer-savvy married girlfriends that dating via Lavalife is “So 2006.” Apparently, the new gamer of love is Facebook, but I felt Lava was a good place for me to start.