Purity Balls, Virginity And Puberty, Oh My!

Created in 1997 by Colorado pastor Randy Wilson, the ceremony of the Purity Ball declares the father the sole guardian and keeper of his daughter’s virginity until the day she is married, all during an unnervingly connubial formal procedure featuring gowns, dinner and dancing. So it’s kind of like prom...except it’s with your dad.

The ball’s apex comes in the form of a series of solemn vows; the fathers rise, take their daughters' hands and simultaneously swear to "cover" their girls "in the area of purity."

"I will be pure in my own life as a man, husband and father," they recite in unison. "I will be a man of integrity and accountability as I lead, guide and pray over my daughter and my family as the High Priest in my home."

Initially, that seems kinda sweet. After all, fathers should worry about the shenanigans their daughters may be getting up to. They should greet new boyfriends with one hand extended to shake and the other curled cautiously around the handle of a baseball bat. But when does involvement become problematic? When daddy’s role as Knight in Shining Armour impedes the princess’ ability to grow up and develop her own autonomy, that's when.

The world is a difficult place. Girls are not born with the inherent ability to make smart decisions; rather, we learn how to properly conduct ourselves through the series of events and challenges we face.

Often, these memorable milestones are of a sexual nature, from growing to understand our own desires and emotions to saying “no” that cooler-drunk night in the backseat of a Volvo. These experiences provide a foundation of little tactics, lessons and victories on which we build the rest of our adult lives.