Are You A Perfectionist Or A Completionist?

Living in an imperfect world life is always likely to be stressful for the 'perfectionist'. Somewhere in the past they learned that if the task was not done perfectly they not only had no right to be happy, they should also feel guilty. That's why it's always a good move to make the shift from perfectionist to 'completionist'.

Most of us have a cupboard or a drawer somewhere that we open once or twice a year. As we survey the cluttered chaos within, we create that thought, "I'm going to tidy the drawer". Then we shut the drawer and walk away. Little do we realize the drawer now exists as an incomplete task in two places, the second place being in our own heads! It's as if we carry the drawer with us in our consciousness as unfinished business. We have made a commitment to do something then we avoid fulfilling the commitment. Nothing wrong with that you may say but what we often don't realize is that our unfulfilled commitment is subtly draining our mental energy. Every time we look at the drawer, or just think about the drawer, it reminds us of a job yet to do and a few 'units' of mental energy are siphoned off in the direction of the drawer.

If we were to take a few moments to reflect we might find we have a substantial list of such tasks backing up within our consciousness like traffic on a busy road. Each one quietly draining tiny amounts of energy that in total is not so tiny. There's that long promised tennis match with David, dinner with Jenny, garden wall to repair, bathroom to tile etc. Individually they seem insubstantial but collectively, after some time they may feel like a burden that we are carrying.